I know that fanfiction is your coping mechanism, and I guess I should have called it that instead of your process. I know that you need it, and I wasn't really trying to say that you should or had to give it up. I just found myself feeling like what we were doing with the collaboration was not as important as these fanfiction challenges you signed up for, and it was bothering me, even though I tried not to let it because it wasn't really anything I had a right to be concerned about. I didn't understand that it was the process, the editing that was the issue. It really did feel at times like everything else was more important than the collaboration and that some of the stuff you were signing up for were might have been ways of avoiding it. I figured I was being unreasonable, but I couldn't seem to stop because I was frustrated with the lack of progress, feeling stymied, and insecure.
Frankly, I still am insecure about it.
I understand the move not being complete. The one I helped my friend with is far from done right now, too.
I have felt before, and still kind of do, that I would rather you not tell me you're working on anything or say that it might be coming. I do get my hopes up, and then things stall out and I get down. It's just easier not to know or expect anything.
I think you still have too much going on to where we should do anything with the stories. I'd rather wait until you were better/clear than add any stress. That's why I said we should wait until you had more time.
And... It bothers me to have you say that you don't care if I do something to the story or not. Why bother if you don't care? Don't do it if you don't care. Do something you care about.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2014-05-16 02:00 am (UTC)Frankly, I still am insecure about it.
I understand the move not being complete. The one I helped my friend with is far from done right now, too.
I have felt before, and still kind of do, that I would rather you not tell me you're working on anything or say that it might be coming. I do get my hopes up, and then things stall out and I get down. It's just easier not to know or expect anything.
I think you still have too much going on to where we should do anything with the stories. I'd rather wait until you were better/clear than add any stress. That's why I said we should wait until you had more time.
And... It bothers me to have you say that you don't care if I do something to the story or not. Why bother if you don't care? Don't do it if you don't care. Do something you care about.